Being a single parent is an adventure. Although we may not have chosen the current situation; we do have a choice in our attitude towards our situation. Below is an example of a mother parenting solo and changes she’s implemented since joining SPIRIT. It’s in bullet point format why? Because I’m a man and that’s how we think. – Percy

Single mother of 9 year old son:

Small changes that changed my relationship with my father and son:

Father/Before:

* My relationship was distant with him 

* We did not communicate much 

* He did not spend much time with my son, his grandson.

Father/After:

By forgiving and focusing on the positives of my father rather than the negatives the dynamic of our relationship began to change.

*  I asked him to help me with projects around my new house. ( His love language is Acts of Service)

* When I call my parents house now we  actually have things in common to communicate . We were able to discuss items that I  need/or could be done with my new home. 

*  Since I am a single mother, my father has stepped in as a active secondary father figure in my son’s life.  This was occurred because I was willing to let my father have an active role in my  own life.

* My father has spent a lot more time male bonding and building a healthy relationship with my son. 

Son/Before: 

* Did not spend as much quality time together.

* Still thought of my son as a little boy, rather than a growing young man.

* We had a combative relationship at times

Son/After

*  We make it a point to eat our meals together, breakfast and dinner.  We do bible study and pray before school while at breakfast. This gives us time to talk about things on his mind.

*  I have given him more responsibilities at home. He makes breakfast  during the school week for us each morning and folds his clothes.  This makes him feel more responsible and mature.

*  We know each others love languages, his are “words of affirmation and quality time”.  I am making a more conscience effort to communicate his love language in those ways.

*  We are doing a better job of speaking from our hearts as it relates to our feelings on different subjects.

My sons feeling about the changes:

He feelings that our relationship has gotten better and that even the small amount of quality time(Breakfast and Dinner, bible study etc..) means  a lot to him.